In deep soup...

Because of my own carelessness
"I apologize to you and you and you. I'm sorry for making you go through this, I truly am. I have learned a valuable lesson I will not forget in a hurry. I took it, you for granted...there were soooo many things I could have done, sooooo many ways I could have done it.

But you know, thats why you've run out of ideas, ideas to help me. Because I haven't helped you - at all. If I could do this over, you'd be suprised because I'll go above and beyond, I'll be meticulous to make sure "you don't grow old". I truly am sorry. I wish you could help me, I wish I had not waited so long to see if I could help you. I wish so many things --- many things like this could have been avoided.

Its past now, don't know if I could move on. Don't know how I could move on. Don't know where to move on to.... Its a hard and cruel task to swim out of this deep soup I cooked up slowly by myself. I will never take anything of your semblance for granted again. This is what you've taught me...Thank you"